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how to find fulfillment

We all have cognitive maps {beliefs, values, defence mechanisms, issues, preferences, patterns, thoughts} that control our lives. These maps were given to us by our parents, teachers, coaches, religious/spiritual leaders, culture, or history.

Do this.
Value that.
Like these things.
Think like this.
Avoid him.
Pursue her.
Eat this.
Wear that.
Feel this.
Say that.

Sometimes our maps serve us well. Often they do not.

When we are little, our lives are supported by the maps of others – it’s how we navigate the strange new world around us and survive.

As we grow up, it’s necessary to craft our own maps – to find the paths that are right for us. If we don’t, we default to other people’s maps and we can end up feeling off track, unfulfilled and living a life feels out of alignment with who we are.

When you wake up to the truth that your map does not accurately represent the territory you want to live in, redesigning an authentic map becomes necessary.

The discomfort of the calling can be extreme.
The confusion of redefining your world can be profound.
The uncertainty of what will happen if you follow your truth can be paralyzing.

The ache to return to the comfortable and familiar is an enticing pull, but following it will prolong suffering.

As painful as it is, it’s necessary to evolve yourself and your world to live a life you love.

Here are a few tips for updating your map

  1. Be aware. Pay to the voice inside that says “it’s time to change”. Notice what changes you are instinctively drawn to make.
  2. Be curious. Follow what pulls you rather than pushing yourself into the “right” choice.
  3. Be open. You may have to redefining everything you thought you knew about yourself, others, and the world.
  4. Be humble. The changes don’t need to be grandiose {though they may be} start with the smallest and simplest change.

As you begin to develop your maps based on who you are and what you value, you will step more fully into your most fulfilling life.