if you’re a parent {or love anyone, really} …

When you think about the most important things you want to give your loved ones, what comes to mind?

If you’ve been here for a minute, you’re probably expecting me to say Love, right? And sure, it’ll always be at the tip top of my list, but on this question, I have a different answer.

I believe it’s Presence.

A long list of personal benefits becomes available when we learn how to make peace with the present moment.

We experience less anxiousness, and more joy. Our self-esteem grows so we show up more fully in our careers and creative pursuits. We solve and soothe challenges more quickly, because we’re able to identify and make use of all the resources around us.

But living with greater presence also offers massive benefits to the people we spend our time with. And as the mother of two Suns, that last point carries a lot of weight for me.

Imagine that your child or partner comes to you, feeling the pain of a major disappointment. They’ve encountered a setback at school or work, or they’re struggling with self-doubt and insecurity.

Because you love them deeply and are invested in their well-being, you might find yourself getting carried down the river with them.

For example, if they come home full of anxiousness and overwhelm, you might take on that same distressed energy.

If they’re drowning in pain, you start feeling just as agonized. Or, their hurt triggers memories of a time when you experienced something similar so you regress to that time.

If their frustration leads to them lashing out at you, you might react with a similar attack, which creates a loop of wounding for both of you.

But if this is our response, we’re hurting the people we love, not supporting them.

These un-present reactions usually cause more harm, instead of helping to soothe and repair.

When our loved ones are struggling, we help them most by honoring the truth of their experience without letting that experience pull us away from our center, our groundedness, our truth. This is Presence.

When we’re truly present, the other person experiences us as a steady and safe place that they can be honest and vulnerable with.

If they’re scrambling to make a complicated decision, we are a far more thoughtful sounding board and idea-generator.

Our emotional stability {that’s what Presence is} helps them start to see beyond the struggle they’re currently attached to.

More than any expensive gift, *THAT* is what our loved ones want the most.

They want to feel that we’re standing strong beside them, not knee-deep in the same reactivity they’re trying to move through.

That’s what true Presence offers – it’s more nuanced than simply putting your devices down and offering direct eye contact {though those things are great}.

This is why growing in Presence doesn’t just benefit you.

When we’re grounded in the present moment, we massively increase the quality of our children’s lives, and my heart will always beat for all the ways that I can do that.

{And! We offer that same quality-improvement to our interactions with our partner, friends, family members, colleagues, and everyone we come in contact with}.

If this matters to you as much as I think it does, I have an invitation for you…

Ever year, I offer a 2 ½ day immersion experience in the glorious Rocky Mountains is called Love The Present.

Love The Present will show you how to deepen your capacity for true Presence {no matter where your skill level currently is, there’s always further and deeper to go}.

You’ll go home feeling greater personal confidence and self-love, and your family and friends will also notice a shift in the quality of your engagement with them – because cultivating this skill is a profound act of generosity and love for the people we love most.

The details are here.

I’d love to support your Presence, and see the waterfall effect that brings for your kids, family, friends, colleagues and everyone you come in contact with.