sabotaging yourself? here’s why.

The purpose of self-sabotage is to mitigate uncertainty.

When we are facing the unknown or walking into unfamiliar territory, fear kicks in to protect us.

Of course, most of the time, this happens unconsciously. We don’t intentionally sabotage ourselves. If it was intentional we would call it self-preservation.

Self-sabotage is born from fear.

We don’t ask for the promotion because we’re afraid of disappointment.
We pretend our lives are perfect because we’re afraid of vulnerability.
We mess up good relationships because we’re afraid of intimacy.
We don’t go for what we want because we’re afraid of failure.
We repress our desires because we’re afraid of rejection.
We hide our truth because we’re afraid of heartbreak.

By avoiding disappointment, vulnerability, intimacy, failure, rejection or heartbreak we avoid life.

But still, we do it.


The subconscious mind believes the pain of self-sabotage is less than the pain that might be waiting in the unknown.

Disappointing ourselves is less painful than feeling disappointed by others.
Rejecting ourselves is less painful than feeling rejected by others.

When bumping up against a self-sabotage the only way through it is to remain committed to the path you want to walk, even if pain is possible.

Your desire to live fully and freely must outweigh your desire to avoid the unknown.