When we understand how something works, we’re in a better position to heal, grow, and learn its lessons.

So since my last post about worthiness seems to have struck a chord, here’s a worthiness-building exercise to try:

Step One:

Think of something you want to experience, but you’ve been doubting whether you’re really capable of making it happen.

With that desire in your mind, fill in the blank below. 

“Someone who has already accomplished (your desire), has qualities like _______________________.” (Aim for at least 3 answers.)

For example, if my desire is to transition into a new industry but I’m worried that I’m too old / inexperienced to make that happen, my answers might be:

– That person probably got a lot of no’s before someone gave them a yes.

 Qualities: COMMITTED & COURAGEOUS.

– That person probably did a lot of reading and research about their new industry. 

Quality: GROWTH MINDSET.

– That person probably used their age as an asset (wisdom, experience, transferable skills).

Quality: CREATIVE & RESOURCEFUL.

Step Two:

Take a few deep breaths, and spend a few minutes reflecting on your past. Scan your history. Think back to your most impactful relationships, biggest career moments and personal milestones (joyous and painful – all of it).

Where in your past do you see examples of the qualities you listed in Step One?

For example, using my examples above:

  1. When I initiated that vulnerable conversation with my partner, I was COURAGEOUS.
  2. Even though it took years to break that unhealthy habit, I never gave up. I kept trying until I got there. I was COMMITTED.
  3. When I was assigned a challenging project at work, I found CREATIVE solutions, and demonstrated a strong GROWTH MINDSET.

Step Three:

Acknowledge the connection between the qualities your current situation requires and the many times you’ve lived out those same qualities in your past. 

Talk about this with someone you love and trust. 

~ ~ ~

Very often, doubting our worthiness arises because we’re so outwardly focused that we’ve forgotten who we really are.

Even if something in your life right now feels especially insurmountable, I promise that your history is littered with evidence of all the qualities you need to emerge from this challenge, even clearer and stronger.  

Alongside the traumas and painful memories in our past, there’s also proof of our resilience, our courageous hearts, and our endless capacity for love and creativity.

Let those pieces of your history inspire your present moment choices.

Let the evidence of the exceptional human you’ve been, guide you into the person you want to be now.