When our goals lack soul we feel burdened. Heavy. Trapped.
Constantly seeking and never feeling satisfied, we race to achieve more.
Unexamined goals prevent us from living a life we love. Here are five signs your goals need a little more soul.
Your satisfaction is dependent on the outcome.
If you’re focused on the end result and hating the process, your ego is running the show.
If you are unhappily starving yourself to drop ten pounds, anxiously checking Facebook to see how many likes your post got, or working yourself into burnout to squirrel away seven figures it’s time for ego to take a back seat.
You’re dishonoring yourself in the process of achieving your goals.
Agreeing to commitments that feel gross just to get the promotion. Signing up for a diet program that messes with your metabolism in order to achieve a magazine worthy body. Critically comparing yourself to others in order to push yourself to achieve more, more, more.
If you are mentally, emotionally, spiritually or physically cause harm to yourself in order to achieve your goals, it’s time to check in with your soul.
You’re sacrificing what matters.
I am constantly asking myself am I sacrificing what matters?
I wrote this article from a gorgeous coffee shop in the Lima airport. I had just finished facilitating a week long retreat in at a secluded spot tucked into the Andes.
My work was sacred and soulful and yet I still wondered am I sacrificing what matters? My boys are three and five and I know my time with them is precious and fleeting.
Before I commit to a gig, I ask myself what deeply matters? I allow this question to guide my sacred yes and honoring no. I don’t always get it right, but I keep asking the question.
You’re seeking approval from others.
If you’re hoping your friends will like you more, your husband will be more affectionate, your boss will validate your worth, or your parents will be proud once you’ve achieved your goal you’re handing your power over to another.
You’re setting yourself up for disappointment, resentment, and powerlessness.
Your life feels like a prison
If you’ve been setting egoic goals for long enough your life will begin to feel like a prison. The good news? You hold the key.
What makes you feel alive on a daily basis? Align your goals with it.
What brings you peace? Infuse it into your plans.
What opens your heart? Add a generous dash of it into your daily life.
When you get to the end of your life, what will make you feel proud of how you spent your time on earth? Make it your priority.
Let your life be guided by your true self.
Infuse your goals with soul.
Live a life you love.
Photo credit – Lee took this at the Great Life Redesign Retreat in 2014